co-pilot

2011-08-01T06:50:00.000-07:00

Apparently life has been to hectic for me to keep up with this lately. Wow, didn't realize how much time had passed since me last post. Enough now that my baby just turned 6! Now here comes the million dollar question EVERY SAHM gets from pretty much everyone once your youngest goes to school full-time. "So, when are you going back to work?" or "What are you going to do now?" Seriously! Like your duties as a mom suddenly stops when they go to school? Really? Wow, news to me! I am SOOO lucky to have a loving husband that makes a good enough salary that I am able to stay home and isn't pushing me to work full-time. This question honestly drives me crazy and I am doing everything I can to not bite the heads off of the people asking, almost as much as those that find out I am a SAHM with a four year degree and say, "Oh, putting that degree to good use I see" with the sarcastic tone because yes, I am putting it to good use as I have a million different "hats" I have to wear as a SAHM.

SO here' what I say to them. My oldest is up at 6 and on the bus at 7, my younger ones get up about 7 and on the bus at 8:10. So reverse of that my oldest gets off the bus at 2:30 and younger ones at 3:30 which gives me then 6 hours to get ready (cause there is no way I am getting up at 5a.m. to get ready before she wakes up!), go to a "job" and be home in a reasonable enough time to help my oldest with homework before the younger ones get home and need my attention as well. Not to mention have everything done and ready before going to any afternoon/evening extra curricular activities to which there is no "magical bus" that will bring them to these said events and bring them home so that is also part of my day as well, along with the house and yard work that also has to be done. Now I am not bitching about this as this is the life I chose, rather I am letting all those out there know that just because our children grow up it doesn't mean our responsibilities get lighter...on the contrary I think they get worse!

When they were younger you could tell that little white lie of "no, they aren't home and can't play today" pretty easily, but as they get older and can talk plans through that doesn't work anymore so you also have to throw in the play dates and other friend events on top of everything else, not to mention try and find some time in between all of their things to meet with your friends every once in awhile and maybe even have a date with your husband on one of the days he is actually home. Again, not complaining as I knew when I married someone who wanted to be a pilot that this is what I was in for, rather just reflecting on my life.

I have a few friends that complain to me and say how lucky I am and how easy I have it that I don't have to work full-time and still do it all (these friends apparently don't think their husbands help out much, some I can say that this is true, others they just like to bitch) but again, this is hard for me to listen to as I reflect in my head..."you should have known what you were marrying." To which I also, think in my head as to not start a girl fight, that you guys don't realize how lucky you are to have a husband that is home every night. Now how he acts when he's there is not anything I can control but just having another adult presence from time to time is huge! The way I get through mine being gone is reminding myself that I have it easy, he's not in the military and gone for months at a time! That way the number of days he is gone doesn't seem so bad after all!

I am just amazed that their is still animosity between SAHM and working moms, we are all moms and should join forces to make everything better for our children instead of complaining to each other and seeing who has it easier or harder in life. Life is what you make of it and you are the only one who can choose to be happy in it...so choose wisely!

Last Year a Blur...

2011-01-05T20:56:00.000-08:00

2011? Where did 2010 go? As I am sitting here writing again for the first time in forever I realize this whole year seems to have been this way. I blink and another month has flown by! I don't know why this year is so different and why it seems to have gone so fast. Is it because my youngest is in school (PT time as it may be, it's still Kindergarten!) and he has more to do which adds to my already long list of things to do with my older two? Is it because on top of being a pilot, which takes him away from home for days at a time, my husband is now also a volunteer fire fighter so our days are always filled with the "be ready to run out the door at any moment" lifestyle? Is it because I am now on two boards and chair a few school events and desperately trying to get into more of a workout routine that I am was also personally busier this past year? Or maybe my time management skills have just flown out the window!

Well I don't think it's the last one because, except for a few Christmas cards I got everything done last year on time (if there was a deadline) or at least by my own personal deadline. I am so glad that I don't have to work outside the home full time that I am able to do the things I do. It is worth every sacrifice we make in order to do this, and I personally don't think we have to sacrifice a lot. So we drive older cars. They still are safe, run good and we take care of them so they're not rusty old prices of crap to look at. We don't go on vacations every year, but we do go to a cabin a lot (my brother-in-laws) which in itself can be like a vacation. I don't have a lot of "real" jewelry, but I like my Premier jewelry just as much, if not more because I don't have to "worry" about it as it if were real. Most importantly our kids get to do things and be in activites that they want so I think things are perfect!

As I wrote on my Facebook page the other day I have a New Year's resolution. Now don't laugh or judge because it's not the usual "I want to lose 20 pounds," (which of course I do but that's beside the point), it's more profound and reflective than that. Here's what I said:

Keep what's important front & center, let go things that are not; make sure those that are important know they are; make new friends and keep old ones close and remember in making yourself happy you also make your relationships happier and stronger in the end as those who are truly your friends will want that for you.

Sadly shortly after writing this a dear old friend of mine told me she was separating from her husband. So I made sure she knew how I cared about her, was here for her and will help her with whatever she decided will be the right path for her to take. Then I felt even worse as I found myself thanking God that I had such a great relationship and wasn't having to go through that myself...does that make me a bad person? No, I think it makes me human. And this is the first New Year's resolution that Ive made that I am going to seriously and with every ounce of effort try and see this through. Every time I find myself pulled into drama that is unneeded and unnecessary I am going to try and step back from it. Now that doesn't mean I won't listen to the drama as I can't shut it out completely, as it is all around me, but I am going to try really hard to not fuel the fire of the drama so that it grows into a saga. Don't need any "never ending stories."

So as I leave tonight's blog it is with my thought for the day; don't stir the pot. And if need be, take the spoon out of someone else's hand who is as it will only benefit both of you in the end.

2010-08-06T11:41:00.001-07:00

Wow the time is just flying by this summer but in good way. I have been so busy this summer that I didn't even get any annuals planted and those with him in Chicago on one of his long lay-overs. that know my well are still shocked by this! I thought being married to a pilot was busy, add to that a fireman and whoa, you could keep yourself busy all the time. Of course I am one of those people that joins every group possible when confronted with something interesting so that could be part of it.

My hubby finally had a set schedule in July so I was able to plan a rendezvous Besides having mechanicals and getting stuck forever trying to get home it was so much fun. Getting to meet and hang out with his crew (who were all really nice and fun to be with, of course being the captains wife they may have been extra nice...lol). I finally got the taste the world famous Gino's Pizza and it was well worth the life-passing-before-my-eyes cab ride to get there. And you thought cabbies only drove crazy in the movies...ha!

My latest conquer is now starting (or re-starting) the fire auxiliary for my hubbies unit. This is really exciting for me because as a pilot's wife there's only so much you can be a part of but this, you can be right in the action without being right in the action so I am totally psyched. Plus I can now see first hand how it really works and once the kids are a little bigger I may just want to be a fire fighter too and show those boys a thing or two...I love doing that! ;0)

So we recently went around to the national night out parties and that was a lot of fun. Seeing all the kids faces light up when that bug fire truck pulls around the corner is priceless! And the police department is sponsoring a family fun night-out at the fire station so there will be all kinds of great stuff to do and me and my new camera will be going crazy! Get to dunk the chief in the dunk tank too (along with the hubby)...good times!

Hopefully I will get to return and post more frequently but only time will tell! Until then, peace and happiness to all!

Wow - where's the last few months go?

2010-05-17T11:29:00.000-07:00

It seems like forever since I've added my two cents...so long that it is now probably almost up to a dime now!...It seems like every time I turn around things are getting busier, but that's what I seem to thrive on. I have joined the ranks of my local city's Park Board so that adds a few meetings and the like here and there on top of just running a household of 5 where one of the grown-ups is either gone at work for days at a time, helping friends or fighting fires, etc. But I wouldn't have it any other way...though it would be nice to have a few more dollars rolling in which is why I am now also on the prowl for a home-friendly part-time job so wish me luck!

May is just a blur already and it's almost half over. With all the family birthdays (even starting end of April with hubbies) 2 of my nieces, my mom, my step-dad, my sister-in-law, my daughter and even me turn another year older this month. Good thing we don't do a big gift exchange or I'd me more broke than at Christmas time! We have a family reunion (his dad's side) at the end of the month too but that's always a blast as his family is fun to hang around with. And we go up to the cabin and just chill for a long memorial weekend so it's perfect! This year the water may even be a little warmer with that hot April we had, though most didn't care last year and still went skiing and swimming, not me though, I need warm water in my old age!

We're getting more involved with the community/fire department stuff/school too and that feels really good to do something on that level. I think it teaches the kids some good values as well. They came and helped when we assisted the Lions with tearing down and re-building their park, which is down the road from our house so we utilize it anyway. I think they'll take more ownership it in now and help keep it nice, though as of now my kids don't seem to be, or haven't been, the vandalizing kind and they'd BETTER NOT EVER BE!

One note of personal frustration has been my weight, as usual for most women. I have been eating better and working out more regularly than ever the past few months and it is a little frustrating with how slow it's going, but I am, admittedly, impatient in many aspects so I know I have to just suck it up and keep plugging away. People have started to notice and the clothes are fitting better so it must be doing a little something - except that baby pouch may be my nemesis for a while to come, at least until I have that tummy tuck ;0)

Well off to enjoy this finally sunny string of days and as the weather continues I'll admittedly not be on as much for those pining away for the next story, I'll do my best!

Does PMS come with Age?

2010-01-27T20:28:00.000-08:00

OK ladies. I have never had what most would consider PMS ever, until now...I think. Either that or I am just getting tired and bitchy in my old age. I am creeping upon the big 4-0 soon and don't like some of the crap my body is going through these days. First of all before my period starts I at times feel like I am either getting a bad cold or even the flu, and don't even get me started about breaking out! I am breaking out more now than I did as a teenager! This totally bites because it is on my chest and back, areas that are hard for me to reach to put any meds or anything on of course, and not to mention going to the dermo and getting meds is extremely expensive!
So now on to the bleeding levels. I am so surprised that I do not get anemic on those first two days. Most nights I have to get up 2,3 and even 4 times a night so that my bed doesn't look like a crime scene! Talk about feeling so far away from sexy! Then there's the beloved clots that look like I an giving birth to an alien child...all I can say is gross. This is the crap that my mother never talked about, but I am gathering she didn't have any of these issues since she sounds sympathetic and not empathetic when we talk. Of course she had to have a hysterectomy after having me so that could explain it too.
So now I am to the point , and age, in my life where I am sick of this crap and am finally talking to my doctor. We tried going back on the pill, which sucked because my tubes are tied so there so no real reason for taking it. Amoung all the vitamins and other crap I have to remember every day already. That didn't solve it so now we;re getting ready for plan B. Ablasion (basically much like a DNC) stay tuned for outcome. If this doesn't work then my next option is a hysterectomy, which I don't want to have. I am already having a heck of a time getting my stomach back in shaoe and my youngest is now 4! Ugh!

Now a Fire Widow too!

2010-01-20T21:14:00.000-08:00

Fire training has started tonight. It will be 2 nights a week for the next 4 months. Ugh! At least this is a set schedule and not the usual fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants schedule that I usually have to live with. But it's all good as thus has really helped him meet some guys in our new neighborhood now that, because of his "real" job, hasn't had time to do. Nice thing for me is most of them are also married so that automatically gets me a few more women friends with common interests as with all my pilot wives!
The more I think this through there a re a lot of different advantages for me with this new fire job too. Besides meeting the wives, several of the firemen are also police in our city and a couple are county sheriffs so I have that little security blanket (literally) and there is now 30 men I can get to know better and call on for assistance is something catastrophically goes wrong with the house while he's on a trip, which all of us pilot wives know that is an inevitable thing...something always happens at least once a year!
The kids are already used to him being gone and they are getting kick out of knowing what's going on around the city before everyone else knows. Of course the joke in the fire hall is that our kids best not do anything "bad" in town or else their dad WILL find out about it because of what he does now. One of the other dads jokingly told us that he told his kids they better go at least two counties over if they plan on being delinquents. I thought that was good humor!

The Bachelor...hahahaha

2010-01-13T13:24:00.000-08:00

I have to laugh when I see the women that drool over the men in this show. I really have to wonder that, at least in the case of this season, if the women really know what they are getting into. There is a big misconception that people still seem too have about this "glamorous" life that people think pilot's (and their wives) lead. They spend hours trudging through different airports, sitting for hours in hotels all the while their families have to go on with their lives like they aren't really a part of it yet at the same time a HUGE part of it. (Wrap your brain around that for awhile).
Being a pilot's wife has so many double edge swords attached to the title that it would make your head spin! You do get to still have a lot of freedom and time for yourself, yet you get lonely and miss them and sometimes resent being married to someone that you don't see for days at a time that makes you "feel" single. Then there is the inevitable time when something at the house or with you goes terribly wrong and then you are quietly cursing them because they are not around to help, yell at or do anything about whatever it is. All things from always mowing the lawn or shoveling; to a stopped up sink or frozen pipes; to having everyone in the house including yourself having the flu...those times are hard when trying to be mom and dad.
Then there is the times that you realize that all that time away from each other and dealing with all that crap you have to deal with makes you truly cherish them a lot more when they are home. Though we all secretly joke about that when they do end up retiring, we'll drive each other in sane because we are so used to them being gone that when they are home for long stretches, we're not used to it! Though through it all we truly love them and are happy they love what they do!

A New Year and a New Time Commitment

2010-01-11T12:59:00.001-08:00

We have now officially been into the new year for 10 days now. My husband has now also officially joined the ranks of the volunteer fire department here in our town. This is a great thing for him though because it is getting him involved in our community and getting him to meet "guys" close to us that he can now hang with and get to know. It's hard when you have a job like his that is basically all over the country so your friends get spread out in the same manner. It will be a little bit of ab adjustment this first year as there is a lot of training he has to go through but we'll make it work, we always do! The kids get a kick out of it though and admittedly get a little saucy now that they can say their daddy is a pilot AND a fireman! I like the two uniforms myself! ;)
This year though there has already been over nine fire calls, most have been quick CO calls but today one of the kids decided they wanted to light a fire in the boys bathroom at the Middle School so made for an interesting morning as the kids were getting ready to go catch the bus and his pager goes off...I'm sure the talk at the bus stop was interesting (even though we told them not to make a big deal out of it and that it was probably just a false alarm...you know kids).
We were invited to go to the Christmas party this past weekend and he was actually off se we went and got to meet all the current and retired firemen and their wives so that was nice, though I can only remeber about 5 or so names! It worked out good to as it was ourr 11th Anniversary that same night so my mom came up and hung out with the kids while we went out. We don't get to do that alot as we don't have a sitter here (and I refuse to pay to have someone watch my kids ;) and grandma is just far enough away that I wouldn't call just for a dinner date.
Now I ztill have to figure out what i want to obe when I grow up. Though I still have 2 years before my youngest is in school full-time. I know the time will fly nby and I know I don't want to go back into Insurance marketing so hmmmmm....what to do!

Happy New Year!

2009-12-31T20:10:00.000-08:00

Well here I am on New Year's and, of course, he's flying but the funny thing is, it's no big deal. My daughter is up at the cabin with her uncle and cousin having a new Year's party and me and the boys are just hanging tonight. I started the day going to a funeral for a friend I went to High School with, WAY to young to be taken from us so my mood wasn't really in a party type mood anyway.
Having small children I would have most likely been coming home around 10 p.m. at the latest anyway as my 4-year old wouldn't be able to last much later, and that's not fair to him just because I want to stay out late. We have also been invited to a Friday New Year's luncheon/BBQ tomorrow so we'll still get to party.
Well, off to cuddle with my boys and watch "Night at the Museum"...Happy and safe New Year to all!

Christmas Crazy has Begun

2009-12-12T17:31:00.000-08:00

First on many Christmas gatherings, of which he was flying for today's. Though I know he'd like to make each and everything we know it's the nature of the beast. I keep reminding him that of the days he isn't working he gets ALL DAY at home with his family and not having to go into an office and just get home in time to eat and put the kids to bed. As I reflect on these days I truly think that we get along as well as we do because we truly treasure the times he is home more so than we might if he were home every day.
Tomorrow is his work's Christmas Party, he is again on-call so we'll see if he's a able to attend. We will still go even if he can't because they asked for ages and numbers of kids earlier for ahead count so they will each get a little "present." Plus, I am trying to teach them that even though dad can't be with us for everything, we still need to participate in things as he'd want us to enjoy ourselves.
Though today was a little frustrating with his schedule as he had a long duty day, but 3 hours of sitting in MSP in between flights. Had we not been at a family Christmas luncheon we would have gone and got him and at least went out to lunch or something so he wasn't sitting there twiddling his thumbs! Though there is a computer and T.V. in the crew room, I imagine it gets boring after awhile, I know I would.
It is also refreshing to remind him that hes not the only one with a whacky schedule as at today's gathering we were trying to find a time for the immediate family on my mom's side to get together and with 2 family members working in the medical field, there's is just as bad around holidays too! And my little brother (he's 33 but still my "little" brother) works for Schwann's so he works all the time too as if he doesn't sell, he doesn't get paid!
Well, time to go and watch "Rudolph" and "The Polar Express" with my kids! Have a good night all!

Tree Day!

2009-12-05T21:11:00.000-08:00

Well, today we had decided to try and got to the tree farm and cut down the tree. He started call at 10a so we figured to be safe let's be there right as they open (9:30a) just in case. Well, luckily he didn't get called in because it did take us an hour and a half to find it. We were being picky this year because of where I want to put it, it had to be tall and skinny! But just as the kids were getting bored and restless, we ran into several families that had their dogs with and that saved us. They were petting and playing with them...really made me wish we had the money to finish the yard and house faster so we can get a dog again! But, after all that we did get the most perfect tree for the spot!
We were able to get the tree in the house and he even helped get things set up for my Premier Jewelry party, played with the kids for awhile during the party but then, yes, he did get called in. So we'll see if it just ends up being an over night-er like he was called for or stretched out 'cause once they got him in there grasp you never know! Sucks too because I have the chills tonight so I am even pulling out the big old ugly long-sleeved-flannely-nightgown. Very NOT attractive!
So hopefully he'll be home at a decent time tomorrow so we can decorate our perfect tree! There's always hoping right!

Holiday - Round 2 (a.k.a. Christmas)

2009-12-02T19:54:00.000-08:00

Well finally got his December schedule and of course since he is "low man" he is on reserve yet again. But hey, we got lucky and he didn't get called in over Thanksgiving so maybe we'll be lucky again. Our kids don't get too upset anymore. They are so used to it and they love getting to have more than one Christmas. We usually end up celebrating with family that's close and then again when daddy is home.
Next to Halloween, this is my favorite holiday for decorating. Monday and Tuesday the hubby and I put up all the lights on the house. He is such a sweetie too because he knows how much I love putting up lights all over so he piped some outlets under the deck so that I can run lights up and around the railings and have all my little lit Christmas trees on the gazebo. And then run the "big balls" (he he) hanging from under the deck. Today I finished all the the indoor decorating (at least what I have, who knows what shopping excursion might bring a new piece to add to the collection!).
I also wanted to get the house looking "just so" form my Premier Design Jewelry party this Saturday. The bummer about this new house though, we don't have all the nitches that we had in the Memphis house for putting all my decorating stuff, but I made do and I think it looks awesome. It will be a lot nicer when we get the basement finished and I can get the big TV and cabinet out of the living room. We are going to get the tree this Saturday, or at least try to. Charlie is on call so hopefully we'll be able to go. There is a cute tree farm we went to last year where you cut your own tree down and then they have hot cider, cookies and all the other fun stuff like that. Can't wait for the smell of Christmas so finish off all the decorating!

Thanksgiving Prep

2009-11-25T10:35:00.000-08:00

So here we are the day before Thanksgiving. We wanted to go to D.C. and visit grandpa but as usual the flights are way too full and we'd get stuck in non-rev hell if we try. I guess that's a double edge sword because as far as my husband's job goes it's good they're full, but it would be nice to fly when and where we wanted to a little easier, like in the "olden days" of more flights and less kids in tow. ;)

But luckily we are once again living in the state where the majority of our families are so it's not that we have a lack of things to do. Stopping by each of our mother's houses on Thursday, deciding if we want to stay in town (we live a little out of the city) and hit the malls for stupid crazy early sales and leave the kids with his mom, go to my nieces hockey tournament and hook up with my dad for dinner on Friday and then up to the cabin for the weekend since he actually has the weekend (and Monday) off, which is only because Thanksgiving falls during the week since he is still low man on the seniority list of this airplane and base. But, that is one of the many things you get used to in this pilot's wife lifestyle.

We have only lived back in our home state for about a year and a half. We are about 45 min away from the airport and most of our family and friends. The kids, of course, have found friends fast and easy with school and activities but it is harder for my husband and myself to do that. Since his "office" is not here and I don't work outside the home adult contact to meet people is more limited. So to try and meet more "guys to hang with" my husband has decided to try out for the volunteer fire department (whoo hoo! two uniforms to drool over...lol). He passed the physical test last week and they will begin interviewing after Thanksgiving. He told me he had to laugh when the chief was giving his speech about making sure the wife/girlfriend was on board with this because there is quite a training program that the city taxes pays for and overall this could mean missing holidays, birthdays and family time in general. He said he knew my comment would be "what else is new? that's normal life around here!" Though I think it will be good for him. Funny thing is at the testing, he found out one of his F/O's lives here too and must be close to us as you have to be within 4 miles of the firehouse in order to qualify, so the world is indeed a small place!

But to all of you here's hoping your Thanksgiving holiday is full of fun, laughter, great food and good company!

Blogging 101

2009-11-24T10:36:00.000-08:00

Well here I am adding to my already long list of "on the computer too much already" stuff and adding a blog to my resume. I have been writing my own little memoir for awhile and even forwarded some of it to Oprah once, obviously she (or her staff actually) didn't see it worthy enough to be used on the show. Go figure! So now I have to figure when and what to write on every day.

Since we are coming up to the holidays I guess I will focus on that now. The holidays and being the wife of a pilot. Funny things is, for those of us who lie this life the holidays aren't always really much different than most other days. They are either home to join in or they are not. When we were first starting out on the great journey of life I will have to admit I felt guilty and didn't always make plans because I wasn't sure if he would be able to come. Then I came to my senses and realized if I did that then the kids and I wouldn't ever do anything either. So here was come upon Thanksgiving and, as usual, he is on call (or on reserve for those who want the "real" aviation terminology). We (meaning the kids and I) were going to try and go out to D.C. and visit with my husband's father, but as usual, we can't non-rev as the flights are all too full and can't afford to buy four tickets so we are not going to make it out there. Nice thing is though now that we've moved back to our hometown we still have lot's of family here to spend time with.

That's when I could get into that debate with people who give me crap saying things like "well you get to fly for free" to which I respond with, "yes, we can, but we can't always get on the flight we want. Then that means either giving up and going back home or sitting at the terminal for sometimes hours waiting for one we can get one...with three kids 10 and under...not fun. Then when we can get on all of our seats are usually spread all over the plane and my children are still too young to be too far away from my view so we then have to take time to ask people to move around. Sometimes they are nice about it but many times the sigh and roll their eyes."

Non-reving. That in itself could be it's own book. Funny things is I find that when my husband meets us on the flight from work (i.e. in uniform) people are always a lot nicer and more cooperative about switching seats. So I guess that's a good thing because that means the uniform still has some respect anyway. Funny story with that for another time. So that's all for today and hopefully I'll remember I have this! haha