Monday, August 1, 2011

Apparently life has been to hectic for me to keep up with this lately. Wow, didn't realize how much time had passed since me last post. Enough now that my baby just turned 6! Now here comes the million dollar question EVERY SAHM gets from pretty much everyone once your youngest goes to school full-time. "So, when are you going back to work?" or "What are you going to do now?" Seriously! Like your duties as a mom suddenly stops when they go to school? Really? Wow, news to me! I am SOOO lucky to have a loving husband that makes a good enough salary that I am able to stay home and isn't pushing me to work full-time. This question honestly drives me crazy and I am doing everything I can to not bite the heads off of the people asking, almost as much as those that find out I am a SAHM with a four year degree and say, "Oh, putting that degree to good use I see" with the sarcastic tone because yes, I am putting it to good use as I have a million different "hats" I have to wear as a SAHM.

SO here' what I say to them. My oldest is up at 6 and on the bus at 7, my younger ones get up about 7 and on the bus at 8:10. So reverse of that my oldest gets off the bus at 2:30 and younger ones at 3:30 which gives me then 6 hours to get ready (cause there is no way I am getting up at 5a.m. to get ready before she wakes up!), go to a "job" and be home in a reasonable enough time to help my oldest with homework before the younger ones get home and need my attention as well. Not to mention have everything done and ready before going to any afternoon/evening extra curricular activities to which there is no "magical bus" that will bring them to these said events and bring them home so that is also part of my day as well, along with the house and yard work that also has to be done. Now I am not bitching about this as this is the life I chose, rather I am letting all those out there know that just because our children grow up it doesn't mean our responsibilities get lighter...on the contrary I think they get worse!

When they were younger you could tell that little white lie of "no, they aren't home and can't play today" pretty easily, but as they get older and can talk plans through that doesn't work anymore so you also have to throw in the play dates and other friend events on top of everything else, not to mention try and find some time in between all of their things to meet with your friends every once in awhile and maybe even have a date with your husband on one of the days he is actually home. Again, not complaining as I knew when I married someone who wanted to be a pilot that this is what I was in for, rather just reflecting on my life.

I have a few friends that complain to me and say how lucky I am and how easy I have it that I don't have to work full-time and still do it all (these friends apparently don't think their husbands help out much, some I can say that this is true, others they just like to bitch) but again, this is hard for me to listen to as I reflect in my head..."you should have known what you were marrying." To which I also, think in my head as to not start a girl fight, that you guys don't realize how lucky you are to have a husband that is home every night. Now how he acts when he's there is not anything I can control but just having another adult presence from time to time is huge! The way I get through mine being gone is reminding myself that I have it easy, he's not in the military and gone for months at a time! That way the number of days he is gone doesn't seem so bad after all!

I am just amazed that their is still animosity between SAHM and working moms, we are all moms and should join forces to make everything better for our children instead of complaining to each other and seeing who has it easier or harder in life. Life is what you make of it and you are the only one who can choose to be happy in choose wisely!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Last Year a Blur...

2011? Where did 2010 go? As I am sitting here writing again for the first time in forever I realize this whole year seems to have been this way. I blink and another month has flown by! I don't know why this year is so different and why it seems to have gone so fast. Is it because my youngest is in school (PT time as it may be, it's still Kindergarten!) and he has more to do which adds to my already long list of things to do with my older two? Is it because on top of being a pilot, which takes him away from home for days at a time, my husband is now also a volunteer fire fighter so our days are always filled with the "be ready to run out the door at any moment" lifestyle? Is it because I am now on two boards and chair a few school events and desperately trying to get into more of a workout routine that I am was also personally busier this past year? Or maybe my time management skills have just flown out the window!

Well I don't think it's the last one because, except for a few Christmas cards I got everything done last year on time (if there was a deadline) or at least by my own personal deadline. I am so glad that I don't have to work outside the home full time that I am able to do the things I do. It is worth every sacrifice we make in order to do this, and I personally don't think we have to sacrifice a lot. So we drive older cars. They still are safe, run good and we take care of them so they're not rusty old prices of crap to look at. We don't go on vacations every year, but we do go to a cabin a lot (my brother-in-laws) which in itself can be like a vacation. I don't have a lot of "real" jewelry, but I like my Premier jewelry just as much, if not more because I don't have to "worry" about it as it if were real. Most importantly our kids get to do things and be in activites that they want so I think things are perfect!

As I wrote on my Facebook page the other day I have a New Year's resolution. Now don't laugh or judge because it's not the usual "I want to lose 20 pounds," (which of course I do but that's beside the point), it's more profound and reflective than that. Here's what I said:
Keep what's important front & center, let go things that are not; make sure those that are important know they are; make new friends and keep old ones close and remember in making yourself happy you also make your relationships happier and stronger in the end as those who are truly your friends will want that for you.
Sadly shortly after writing this a dear old friend of mine told me she was separating from her husband. So I made sure she knew how I cared about her, was here for her and will help her with whatever she decided will be the right path for her to take. Then I felt even worse as I found myself thanking God that I had such a great relationship and wasn't having to go through that myself...does that make me a bad person? No, I think it makes me human. And this is the first New Year's resolution that Ive made that I am going to seriously and with every ounce of effort try and see this through. Every time I find myself pulled into drama that is unneeded and unnecessary I am going to try and step back from it. Now that doesn't mean I won't listen to the drama as I can't shut it out completely, as it is all around me, but I am going to try really hard to not fuel the fire of the drama so that it grows into a saga. Don't need any "never ending stories."

So as I leave tonight's blog it is with my thought for the day; don't stir the pot. And if need be, take the spoon out of someone else's hand who is as it will only benefit both of you in the end.